The Cheese Lady

I once worked for a small women's clothing company called Pookie and Sebastian. The oweners, apparently named their business after their two dogs. I was just a salesgirl and not a very good one at that. One day, a woman with bright orange hair and a ragged coat came in. At first I thought she might be homeless but she had brand new shopping bags with her. I tried to avoid her but we were required to greet every customer we came across no matter what; so I had to offer her help. She was grumbling about needing to buy her neice a gift.

"What do you buy a model? My neice is a model!" she said, rather agressively, in my opinion.

I showed her some scarves- always a good choice when you don't know the recipent's size. "Nawh, Nawh! What do you get for a model?! I don't know! Jesus!", was her response to my suggestions.

But before I could show her some of our jewelry, she wipped out a large block of orange cheddar cheese- it had to have been at least a pound. I'm not sure where she was concelaing the cheese- perhaps her coat? In any case I was so stunned that I could think of nothing to say for a full minute. This revire was finally broken when I realized that she was asking me for something.

"You got a pen?" she asked.

Without taking my eyes off the cheese I said, "WHAT?"

"I need a pen to open this cheese."

"We don't allow eating in the store." (I was glad to be able to make such a concreate statement.)

She looked at me with complete and utter exasperation.

"I don't want to EAT it!! I just wanna OPEN it!!"

I thought about this and figured I'd give her sicssors instead of a pen. Though, I did pause and think to myself, "am I really going to give this obvious mental patient a sharp object?" I decided she seemed like the kind of person I didn't want having a complete meltdown in front of me. So I handed her the sicssors and after opening the block of cheese, she left.

I only worked for Pookie and Sebastian for three months. But that, by far, was the best story I got from that place.

Children's Books I Love

So here's the list of children's books (mostly picture books but not all) I love, in no order: (except for the first, it's actually my #1 favorite)

One Monster After Another
Runaway Bunny
George and Martha
Bread and Jam for Frances
The Funny Thing
Millions and Millions of Cats
Mrs. Ticklefeather and her Puffin Paul
The Monster at the End of This Book
Courdoury
Good Night Gorilla
Horton Hatches the Egg
Where the Wild Things Are
My Father's Dragon
Marshmellow
A Day at the Zoo
Harry the Dirty Dog
Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel
The Story of Ferdinand
Goodnight Moon
Calandar Dogs
Oh, The Places You'll Go
Ira Sleeps Over
No Roses for Harry
Five Chinese Brothers
Katy No Pockets
Little Bear
Curious George
Blueberries for Sal
Make Way for Ducklings
Tootle
The Little Engine that Could
The Sailor Dog


I think there are a ton more, but these are all I could think of today.

Books I Love

For want of something interesting to write, here is a list of some books I've read and love. (In no order)

1984
Brave New World
Pride and Prejudice
Oryx and Crake
The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Lord of the Flies
East of Eden
Grapes of Wrath
The Sun Also Rises
A Spot of Bother
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time
Dune
Watership Down
Stranger in a Strange Land
The Call of the Wild
Starship Troopers
The Cider House Rules
The Hobbit
A Confederacy of Dunces
Handling Sin
To Kill a Mockingbird
Hitty: Her First 100 years
ShoGun
The Life of Pi
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (all)




That's all I can think of right now... I guess I could have put in all the authors, but I don't think anyone besided me is really reading this, so it doesn't matter. Maybe next I'll do lists of movies, children's books and music.